Computers Crash as Wisconsin Hunters Rush to Buy Turkey Tags

   “Thundering herd problem.”

   That’s how IT (information technology) folks diagnose uncommon, but not rare, calamities when computer systems collapse as people stampede websites to buy coveted tickets for concerts, playoff games or hunting licenses.

   Wisconsin’s turkey hunters recorded their third such meltdown in 18 years on March 16 shortly after 10 a.m. That’s when the Department of Natural Resources began selling leftover $10 “bonus” tags for the spring hunt, which begins April 11 with a two-day youth-only season.

   March 16 sales were for Zone 1, a popular area covering southwestern Wisconsin from Buffalo County to Green County, and as far east as Madison. Roughly 8,000 hunters thundered onto the DNR’s GoWild license site as 10 a.m. neared, and churned several minutes in an online queue to get their assigned turn. Once inside, they signed into their account; snagged a tag for periods C, D, E or F; and dropped it into their electronic sales “cart.”

   And then … nothing happened. They sat, watched and clicked the pay tab in futility.

   I was among those stuck in that online Limbo, growing ever-more annoyed by the error message on a pink background: “The payment processor reported an error when setting up the payment request. Error: Configuration error, unable to find Merchant.”

     For the third time in 18 years, the Department of Natural Resources’ computer system failed when hunters jumped online to buy leftover turkey tags for the upcoming seasons in April and May.     — Patrick Durkin photo

   Minutes later I found myself staring at a blank screen, with a simple message at its center: “Unable to connect to the server.”

   In other words, GoWild’s bouncer had tossed me out the door and onto the curb.

   When I signed back into GoWild, it assigned me a new spot in the online queue, down the street and around the corner behind 11,500 other annoyed customers.

   I didn’t like that option, so I opened a new window in Safari, my computer’s search engine, scanned its history and copied the last known link to my GoWild basket. After pasting the link into the search window and hitting the return key, I miraculously jumped back into the checkout line, my GoWild cart still holding my order.

   And then I got thrown out again 10 minutes later, so I repeated the process.

   Curse, copy the link and paste.

   And then again.

   Curse, copy and paste.

   Finally, a miracle happened about 11:30 a.m.: A payment window opened, requesting money.

   The system works!

   But emails from friends and critics soon confirmed not everyone was so lucky. Or happy. Even though the DNR eventually sold thousands of turkey tags that day, many hunters didn’t get what they first put into their basket.

   And win or lose, nearly everyone wasted time while fuming in frustration. The DNR’s Facebook page soon had over 300 negative, even nasty, comments. One man wrote: “You would think with all the money they take in, and all these years (of experience), they would have all the bugs worked out or change the system. Morons!”

   Another wrote: “Absolutely pathetic service from the DNR website. And I hear it is like this every year.”

   One guy was so mad I could picture his inflamed face as he spewed a profane, punctuation-free message: “You’re $#&# system sucks waited in line was 3800 in line I live in zone two and you gave me a $#&# permit for zone seven then I waited for the bonus all the way to my number and your thing $#&# bailed out on me you inbred piece of $#&#$#&# $#&#”

   Wow! Whew. Insert sound of water hissing on stove top here.

   At risk of sounding unsympathetic, can’t we concede that computer systems crash? As the expression goes, “(Poop) happens.” Yes, the DNR’s March 16 meltdown resembled similar crashes in 2016 and 2008 when it was selling bonus turkey tags. But online sales crashes aren’t unique to the DNR. They seem inevitable when trying to buy tickets for playoff games, Taylor Swift concerts, or nonresident hunting licenses out West. My worst experience was December 2022 when wasting a full day trying (and failing) to buy an Idaho elk tag.

   Likewise, computer-system failures occasionally shut down air travel, whether it was United Airlines in August, Alaska Airlines in July or the global Microsoft Windows crash in July 2024 that grounded over 5,000 Delta, United and American airline flights.

   As one IT guy said to another: “When everything works, they ask why they need us. And when everything fails, they want us dead.”

   Whether computers crash individually at home or en masse worldwide, they aren’t everyday or even “every-year” occurrences, despite what we vent in the moment. They often strike after software updates and, for online sales, when the system is processing complicated payment information, such as passwords, security codes, licenses remaining, licenses available, credit card numbers, frustrated extra clicks, and whether you’re human or a “bot.”

   Meanwhile, the DNR takes the blame because we can kick it without fear of arrest and deportation to El Salvador. The DNR, however, contracts those internet sales with Tyler Technologies, which provides similar services to agencies in Alabama, Arkansas, California, Hawaii, Indiana, Kentucky, Mississippi and Vermont. Tyler Technologies was also involved in the June 2023 crash when thousands of deer hunters rushed online to buy antlerless tags from the Pennsylvania Game Commission.

   Taylor Finger, the Wisconsin DNR’s game-bird ecologist, said sales volumes on March 16 resembled those the past two years for bonus turkey tags. When 7,890 turkey hunters jumped into the queue on Monday, March 17, a year ago, they didn’t crash the system. The same system also performed in November as Wisconsin hunters rushed to get their gun-deer licenses and antlerless tags.

   Finger said Tyler Technologies made some software changes since the gun-deer season. No matter the cause, history suggests Tyler Technologies will fix its system and the DNR will grovel to please disgruntled hunters. After the 2008 crash, the DNR received $155,000 in compensation from the vendor it was then using, and applied $90,000 of it to promote youth turkey-hunting programs.

   In fairness to Tyler Technologies, it has won plaudits and awards from its many clients for reliable service over the years. It also doesn’t just update its software and assume it’s fine. Tech-service companies run simulations to test how updates handle sudden sales spikes, but simulated tests aren’t flawless either.

   Only one thing seems certain: The next time my computer freezes while I’m trying to buy elk or turkey tags, I’ll find no comfort in apologies or failed simulations.

   No, I’ll copy and share that angry post mentioned earlier: “Your thing $#&# bailed out on me you inbred piece of $#&#$#&# $#&#.”